Workplace What-the-Fuckery: Necromance Edition

What do these three items have in common?

• Used condom.
• Whole, raw sweet potato (or quite possibly a yam).
• Fecal pile (definitely mammalian; possibly human, inadequately tucked into a plain brown lunch sack).

All three items were discovered one day (several years ago*) outside the entrance to my office building

Additionally, another day resulted in a brown lunch sack full of fecal material, that appeared as if the originating extruder's diet consisted of nothing but canned pumpkin.

*Unfortunately, sadly, no photographic proof. This was back before I had a cell phone with a camera feature. Inexplicably, I dredged up that memory today, and figured I'd slap the memory herein to share. Because I'm a fucking "giver."